Have you ever had feelings for someone, and they just didn’t feel the same about you? Did you start out as friends and then you felt stronger feelings as time went on? Most people have had to deal with this situation in one time or another and this can be something that is hard to get over when you have strong feelings for someone, especially if they are a close friend.
When someone doesn’t feel the same as you feel about them, you will start to find ways to blame yourself for these reasons. You will blame how you act or how you look, and you will start having lower self-esteem. You don’t want to go down this place and the problem is not you.
There are positive reasons and ways that you can cope with loving someone that doesn’t love you back. Pick a way that will work for you and learn to cope with this in a positive way. Having feelings of anger, sadness, shame, disappointment and more are valid feelings after you find out that they do not love you. You have to give yourself time to heal and time to move on, remember the feelings don’t leave overnight.
Find a Distraction
When you realize that you are dealing with someone that is not going to love you back, you can get stuck in this and start wishing and thinking too much on things. Learn to distract yourself and find things that you love to do.
If you love to watch tv, then do that or if you want to go to the gym, do that, whatever it takes to keep you distracted. Whatever you can find to enjoy, do that so that you can have positive feelings and chemicals that will run through your body. Keeping yourself busy is better than pondering on things that will cause you pain.
Talk to Someone
Find a family member or a friend that you trust and talk to them about how you are feeling.
Speak to them about what happened and see if they can give you any good words of advice. Let them be kind to you and treat you with respect and this is way better than you are treating yourself.
Doing this can help you to deal with what is going on inside of yourself.
Love Who You Are
The best thing that you can do for yourself when you are sad or upset is to show love to yourself. Love who you are and make sure that you are working to do something good for yourself.
Whatever makes you feel good, do it. Spend time with things that make you happy and show yourself how much you care about who you are.
Doing these things can help you to feel positive in your life and help you not to be sad. This can help you to cope and to be positive.
Acknowledge Your Emotions
It can be hard to acknowledge your emotions and deal with someone not loving you back, but you have to understand that the other person has pain too. When we get into these situations, we have a lot of emotions and we don’t think about the other persons emotions.
If you are in their same situation, you will see that rejecting someone is not easy to do. They could have many reasons why they don’t want to get into a relationship with you and if they hurt your feelings or your friendship, this could cause them pain as well.
It takes a lot of courage to turn someone down that you care about and don’t want to hurt.
Distance Yourself
If you look at your situation and you realize that you are not able to get over this fast, take time to distance yourself. Take time to cope with who you are and to concentrate on what the friendship really means to you.
Try to distance yourself form them and even stop seeing them if it makes it hard for you. Don’t go back to them until you are comfortable.
This can give them time that they need as well and let you to focus on who you are as a person and to love yourself.
Set Goals
When you have negative energies and you are angry, it is hard to think about anything but that situation. Try to focus on your future and plan things that you have to look forward to. Do things that make you happy so you can be distracted.
Set goals for yourself such as a savings goal or a fitness goal. Do this in a positive way so that you can focus on yourself and not your hurt. Let yourself know that you have a lot to offer.
You are not the negative of the situation and you are bigger and better than you know. You have a lot of potential and a lot of things that you can look forward to in the future. Do not let this situation judge you for who you are or cause you to have self-loathing.